Saturday, 11 August 2012

There is no guide book for parenting

A lot has been said and written about parenting. Choices have been weighed, styles have been defined, the dos and don’ts have been brought to light and even the ideal route has been set. However, nowhere it has been discussed about parenting being subjective. Nobody never really focused on the thought that there isn’t any book or self help that works for everyone. That everyone who first becomes a parent is as new to the experience of parenting as a baby is, while she takes her first step. It is a world of uncertainties and it is definitely not easy.

We have different stages in our life. Almost all of them revolve around us or our partner. All these stages have us being the anchor of our life but everything changes post childbirth. Suddenly, everything that we yearn, hope, like, love, hate, desire or even decide affects an individual who depends on us for care. We are now responsible to make or break the character of an individual. It is now in our hands to either set a good path and make life wonderful or stray from the responsibility, misjudge it and make everything worse for the kid. We normally bank upon our parents and elders who have had a big hand in raising us and refer to their style of parenting. Though, the fear of doing the right thing becomes a permanent residence in mind.

There is no best, correct or right thing to do here. It is all trial and error. It is all about instinct and beliefs. As a child, we wanted different things from our parents. Irrespective of whatever, they did for us; there was always that one thing we thought we never got from them. It is going to be the same way with our kids. After all, we are human beings. We are not meant to be perfect. We do what we feel is the best and that ‘best’ might not be the best for all. We need to accept this fact and try to not beat ourselves up every now and then.
Thus, leaving aside our prejudices, fears, apprehensions, and not letting them influence the child’s mind would really help while parenting. We can just hope that kids discover who they are as a person and what they want to do with their life. All we can do is, give our best.  

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